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The next morning the document was signed and I returned it to my solicitor and asked him to make the preparations to market the house, Amanda and I barely spoke in the days following and it was with some relief that I finally left for America. I settled in quickly and had a few sexual interesting adventures (separate stories), Amanda kept in touch via email and most evenings there was another new email with her begging for forgiveness and telling me how sorry she was and how well she was behaving, I only ever replied with questions regarding the house sale and as I was still meeting my side of the housekeeping expenses questions about unpaid bills etc, as I still had access to her emails I used to occasionally read them to see what she was up to and to be quite honest I was quite pleased that she seemed to have regained her sanity, Tim had asked her out several times but she always declined, in her emails to Susan she seemed genuinely to believe that I had been a willing participant. He did go out of his way to prove that night that he wasn’t a 1-minute man, he also seemed to go out of his way to prove that he could never make me cum, unfortunately, even when he tried—which he almost never did, contentedly falling asleep after he got off in less than 5 minutes. I felt even more terrible and depressed after the sex than before, which has always seemed to be the pattern with him. I was mad at myself for letting that creep back into my life so easily, knowing that he wouldn’t give me what I needed that night, emotionally and/or physically. He was a user under the impression that he was some kind of incredible fuck, the only reason I fell for him in the first place was because of the ‘Mr. Nice guy’ he pretended to be, and once I saw the lie he was living, I still couldn’t seem to see past what I thought was the ‘real’ him–someone caring and kind, not cold, who I should have patience with to someday open up emotionally, or at the very least get me off, the way he kept.
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